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Post by Caden Hong on Dec 6, 2015 16:24:15 GMT
I felt like this story had one of the most accurate depictions of how people change when they are faced with death. Both of them knew that she would die at one point, but they only come into full acceptance with that fact towards the end of the chapter. In the first half, we see a lot of arguments and conflicts between them, mainly from miscommunication and misinterpretation of each other’s words and behaviors. The wife wanted the husband to stay by her bedside so that they could spend as much time together as possible. On the other had, the husband wanted to go out to find different foods and medicine for her so that she can stay alive for as long as possible. They both had this idea of “spending more time with each other” in mind, but they ended up executing it in different ways. I think it’s clear that they love each other, but the wife’s illness drastically changed the dynamics of their relationship from being husband and wife to a patient and caretaker. I know this from personal experience, that when you’re sick and in bed all day, you lose track of time and everything becomes mundane. And especially when you have a felt sense that you’re not going to live for very long, you want to spend more time with your loved ones. The wife was in a very vulnerable place because everything in her daily routine depended on the presence of her husband. But the fact that her husband failed to see this side of her really hurt her, and in some sense validated how much of a burden she was on him. I think in situations like this, the caretaker should give in to the demands and needs of the one who is sick because they obviously cannot do anything without the help of the caretaker. While the husband states that it was hard for him to see his wife in bed all day, this experience should not necessarily be about him but on how comfortable and safe he can make his wife feel during her last few weeks/months of her life. I really appreciated when there was a change in the ways these two interacted with each other. The husband was starting to be more in touch with his emotions, especially of fear and grief, while the wife began to speak to her husband in a softer tone. I wasn’t sure if the ending implied death or a change in health (in a positive direction) for the wife, but either way I think it was a good place to end in the story. I think “Spring Riding in a Carriage” is one of my favorite stories we read this semester.
Who did you find yourself sympathizing with more throughout the story — the wife or the husband? Did your feelings change towards the end?
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Post by Won Young Seo on Dec 9, 2015 16:29:22 GMT
I did sympathize more with the husband. He remained at the wife's side by choice and was constantly the target of her lashing out, but he still went to the market everyday to get innards for her and took care of her.
I also felt bad for the wife, as I think she really does care about him, but in the beginning she's consumed with her own pain and can't help but lash out at him. When he said that he was tired and finally showed her his true feelings, I think the wife really was able to understand just how much the man was giving up by staying at her side.
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Post by Airy Yeh on Dec 9, 2015 19:59:08 GMT
I sympathized with both. The wife was acutely ill and she was in sharp pain from the constant coughing. It is depressing and painful both physically and emotionally for her, and she is not at fault for being in a bad mood. I think the pain and suffering during one's illness is a very personal experience and no one can speak for the patient how terrible it can be. I sympathized with the husband also because I know that grieving for a loved one is hard. Also he nurses her constantly and with such a devotion that it is only natural for him to get tired and discouraged especially when seeing that she isn't getting better. Nursing is hard for the caretaker and it can wear anyone out. He doesn't seem to have much support from others as well. I liked the ending as well because it ended on a positive note and their suffering seems to have lightened.
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Post by Hiba Rashid on Dec 10, 2015 5:14:20 GMT
This story is definitely one of my favorites too because it is not set in a specific time period and has universal themes relating to family, death and loss. It is one of the more relatable stories that depicts a real experience that can anyone can be faced with. And it made me cry!
As for your question, I think it's really difficult to choose sides when it comes to which character to sympathize with more. Both of them were responsible for their arguments and conflicts. Yes, of course, the wife experiences an immense amount of physical and emotional pain, knowing that she did not have much time left in the world. I can imagine that being extremely depressing and hard to face. But, I can imagine it being equally as painful for the husband to watch someone he truly loves slowly die before his eyes. He is as helpless as the wife over this situation. He is human and therefore has his moments of selfishness. Even though he says spiteful things to her, he never leaves her alone and constantly cares for her. I am glad they let go of their pessimism towards the end and finally come to peace with each other.
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Post by Teng Lai Chang on Dec 10, 2015 14:45:49 GMT
At first, I felt more sympathy toward the husband because I can imagine how hard it will be to take care of someone who's ill and who's constantly complaining about how the husband should spend more time with her when he already was. However, towards the end of the story, I realize the wife actually doesn't want to act that way and just misinterpreted her husband's care as an obligation (it was the illness that was changing her and making her think this way). Like any other person during his or her last moments of life, the wife just wants her beloved one to spend more time with her. So I'm glad that they were able realize each other's pain, learn how to cope with that pain, and understand each other's feelings at the end of the story.
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